Looking back in hindsight
I wonder how some
Of my ex girlfriends
Would have handled me
Getting diabetes
Sian who lived with her wealthy parents
And who kissed me with a desire
Beyond her tender years
Would have resented my inability
To keep running down to London.
Helen would have sat in front
Of her ever increasing cocktail bar
And have said what the hell
Can you drink now
(which in reality was very little).
Dani would have been sympathetic
But secretly missed our film and pizza weekends
When it then became apparent
My whole diet and sleeping pattern
Would have to totally change.
Sam no doubt would have cheated on me
Even quicker than what she did
When she saw the list of appointments
I would have constantly live with
For the rest of my life.
Each relationship
Twisting different emotions
In particular now
Entwined in imaginary
Last embraces
Coyly enamoured
Consuming memories
Creating different backdrops
To each element of my life
Like a jazz record cut off
Half note
Passing through each door
With no chance
Of sliding backwards
Even if I wanted
Exploding emotions
Cast aside from changes in health
A history lesson
Tied together in a cluster of dots
Ripped apart
Into a totally different jigsaw.
(Another poem from my up
and coming third solo poetry book
‘From the Diabetic Ward’)